Healing in progress

Two weeks ago, I was about 6 miles into a 20 mile trail run; and I came across this sign: Healing in progress, stay on designated trails. Wow, did that statement ever hit home.

I had been stressed out lately trying to balance life, while pushing towards goal completion. Work demanded a lot from me, our house project demanded a lot from me, my youngest daughter was now entering dress week for her play that she had been working on for the last four months, and my other daughter is entering her pre-teen years (which is a wild ride all of it’s own as a parent). I was trying to stay mindful of my role as father and husband, and oh yeah…I signed up for a 20 mile trail race a couple of months ago.

These are all good things, but spreading yourself thin can set you up for failure if you are not intentional about your commitment to the goal.

If work is demanding a lot from me, then I must be doing something right. The house project is a gift and a privilege in and of itself, but it takes some serious mental grit to keep grinding on it after work and on the weekends.

My daughter has found a true passion for the theater which brings joy to my heart. My other daughter is still searching for something to commit to,  and I would run myself ragged for my kids if it enables them to pursue their dreams.

Being a husband and a father takes commitment and time too. I want my wife to know that she is valued, that she is important enough to me that I am willing to put in the work to develop a strong mind. She is an encourager, a hard worker, and she has mental grit.

I came across this statement from Bear Grylls in the book Tribe of Mentors by Tim Ferris (pg. 231)

“Hold tight, focus the effort, dig deeper, and never give up. It isn’t rocket science but it’s hard, as most people, when it gets tough start to look around for an excuse or a different tactic. often, though, when it starts to get tough, all it requires is for you to get tougher and hold on. The magic bit is that when it gets like this, it often means you are near the end goal! One big heave of focus, dedication, and grit, and you often pop out the other end. Look around you, though, and you see that most people are gone – they gave up in that final bit of hurting.”

I write this morning as I near the end goal of this Spring stretch. My daughter’s final performance was last night. We completed a major milestone at work. We are laying floors and installing cabinets in our addition; which means that the end goal is near. I finished my 20 mile race a couple of weeks ago, and left it all on the course. I have been trying to give 100% in all areas of life, and it has not been easy; but it is a challenge that is worth the effort.

Back to the beginning of this blog. Healing in progress, stay on desgnated trails.

The sign I saw on the side of the trail during that race impacted me deeply. It helped propel me to a new level of awareness during that race. I realized that the pain I was feeling, the hours ahead, the sweat on my brow; were all part of something I needed…healing. I embraced that I was doing something I truly loved. I went into that race overwhelmed,  with no real time to train for it (other than eating a lot and drinking beer); but I found myself being renewed.

As the pain in my body increased over the 3.5 hours, and my feet began to throb with each step; I knew I was being refined. I would leave this race stronger, both physically and mentally.  I would be able to go back home and work hard, and I knew that a resilience was being built in me.

 

The Struggle is a Privilege

Have you ever found yourself impacted by a quote or statement?

“I love a good quote.” – Me

I am constantly looking for tid bits of wisdom in blogs or books, or listening for them in conversations and presentations. Whether it’s inspiration or insight, I find that words can have a great impact.

I was downtown with a friend at a local coffee shop, just talking about life’s happenings; and we got on the topic of how much change takes place in middle schoolers as the journey of identity and physical change takes place. There is such an internal struggle to understand why we are the way we are, who we are supposed to be, how we want to dress, how we want to be perceived, and so on. That was a long time ago for me, but my daughter is just entering that phase of life.

As we discussed the struggle for self discovery, he said,”The struggle is a privilege.”

He went on to explain that our society and culture allow for us to have these teenage years to fumble through finding our identity. There are kids around the world who do not get the time to figure things out, because necessity draws them into work or affiliation to survive. There are many kids in America even, who do not get a chance to complete high school before duty and survival calls upon them.

“The struggle is a privilege.”

I have not been able to kick this phrase since I heard it, and I do not want to forget it. These words bring perspective. These words flip the world upside down. This phrase has been challenging me lately, because I have been struggling and stressed. I have felt like somewhat of a failure in some regards, feeling like I am mediocre at best in all parts of my life; instead of focusing in on each opportunity to the best of my ability.

Yet in the midst of the whirlwind, I remember “the struggle is a privilege.”

I can now step back for a moment as I remember this phrase, and I can see that though I feel spread thin; I am spread thin over opportunities, beauty, love, investments, and chosen commitments. Each one is something to be thankful for. So, can I put these words into action? Yes. I can, I am, and I will.

Complaining about what needs to be done, is time wasted; time that could have been used to actually accomplish something. This time could be used to establish a positive mindset about the path before me. The minutes and hours spent in downheartedness; I believe they were necessary to get me here, because it was a real feeling. It is usually when we get close to the bottom, that we finally reach out. Like in the movie  What about Bob? I am starting with baby steps towards who I need to be, and what I need to do.

So, if you find yourself weighed down with the expectations laid upon you; stay true, stay focused, and realize that “The struggle is a privilege.”